That's right, every gluttons favorite holiday! A holiday built on taking advantage of the Indians, while ten years later there they are, on the Trail of Tears while Sitting Running Moose is telling Monkey In Her Eye "Why'd we break bread with those motherfuckers? They'd have been dead that winter if we hadn't done something..." as a ten year old boy trips over a fallen musket, and breaks his head on a covered wagon wheel.
And really, has this holiday changed? Every year, for a day, you're forced to share your house (Or take the role of the settlers) and mooch on someone elses Climate Control, and gorge yourself on their food. And the rest of the year, you're thinking "God damn.... I don't wanna go back" but there you are next year with a Jello Mold and a plate of Deviled Eggs.
And its not even a real holiday. There's no Great Turkey that goes around feeding the starving, no, its a holiday much like every other day. The rich get fatter and the not so rich fake being thankful. Who's ever really thankful these days, ESPECIALLY for their family? Seriously. How many people here can seriously say "They piss me off sometimes, but overall, I like my family!"
And lets not forget that it doesn't even have a set day. Fourth Thursday in November is KINDA skeet isn't it? Sir Squeezle thinks we poisoned the turkey so the indians forgot (Which I really wouldn't put past our white bastard ancestors...... this only applies to white people. Sorry everyone else.)

What a stupid holiday.